Apr 22, 2010

Connection Failed. Try Again?

These past seven days felt really long. In the beginning things were good and normal. By the end of the week I began feeling parched and a little zombie-ish.  I've been thinking about what/when my next entry would be...thinking about it and only vaguely praying about it.  See, it started one day when there was something more pressing than reading my Bible and praying. Then the next day, something else came up that was also "more important." By day three, the thought was more like, "oh yeah, and I should read my Bible if I have time." That's when my connection started to fail. My prayers became more shallow and less of a conversation. The focus shifted from what God is doing to what I thought he should be doing.

I haven't had a teachable heart these past few days. This morning I made the choice to once again sit and read and pray and open up my heart to my Savior. At this point it was a choice, an action that had come so easily just a week before was now shoved to the back burner, and my heart felt the displacement.  My mind struggled again with sinful thought patterns that have already been conquered.  I guess that's when I realized that I had disconnected myself from The Vine.  This morning's act of humility and obedience felt like cool water to my parched soul.

It is important to remind myself that God did not disconnect from me.  I know this because He has promised it, "I'll never let you down, never walk off and leave you." (Hebrews 13:5). In fact, it was His urging that I was not heeding when I decided to not spend time with him. I'm so thankful that I have a God that pursues a relationship with me. He is jealous for my attention and will not let me go

Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. 
Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
(James 4:8 ESV)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What a great reminder. How quickly our thoughts go astray.