Oct 24, 2012

The life in the blank pages

It happens to the most beautiful journal. Even the one that is so comfortable to write in. I find so much comfort in getting my thoughts out one day and then it happens. The blank page that lingers for months on end, sometimes extending into years. When I open the many journals around my house I can usually flip right to that empty page. I often stare at it and try to remember what all happened between that last written page and this new page I'm about to start.

I was looking through this journal and was sort of shocked to see how little I have actually written this year. I'm not sure why that makes me so sad. I guess because I has once found so much comfort in pouring out my thoughts here..

There has been so much life happening in the empty pages of this journal. So many good things and more upsetting things too (which is to be expected).  As I start this new page in the journal, I find myself hesitant to get into the specifics of what I am praying through. Perhaps it's because I feel like I need to get reacquainted with this part of my life.  I'm not used to just blurting things out anymore. But in an effort to get myself used to it more quickly, here are some examples of what has been going on this year.

  • I began this year with a goal of loosing 60lbs of my body weight. I have prayed and struggled through many temptations. I have begun exercising more regularly and have become more conscious of what I am eating nutritionally. As of today I am less than 5lbs from my goal (4.1 to be exact). I know in my heart that the only reason for my success is that God is good and he has given me the strength and wisdom that is needed because I have prayed for them nearly every day.
  • My dad was diagnosed with stage 4 gallbladder cancer earlier this year. We are so happy to see God working through his treatments and are praising Him for every victory and positive report along this journey. We are confident that God is close to our family, especially my dad, throughout this experience. He is the Healer and we are praying for him to heal Dad. It will be so wonderful to celebrate his birthday with him this weekend!
  • I am excitedly expecting a new niece to join our family in January! We are rejoicing with my brother and sister-in-law to see that God has turned their mourning into dancing, just as the Psalmist said. We also were excited to welcome our friends' babies into the world. Every baby is such a blessing and gift, they bring so much joy!
There has been so much more happening that I really can't take the time to write about. I guess I'll just have to get back into the habit of journaling again.

No comments: